In a little over 2 months, it will be two years since my mother passed away. I still haven't deleted her number from my phone. I don't know why. I don't think about these things anymore, if I can help it.
There are still many days where I feel like I did nothing right. The feeling of complete and utter helplessness—feeling like I could do nothing but passively sit by and watch her die—still destroys me. The relationship we had when she was alive was tremulous at best, but everything I am and everything I have is because of her, and so I reflect on the positive because I know things could be so much worse.
Having been through all that, my perception towards what struggle, heartbreak, and stress really is has changed significantly. For better or for worse.
No comments:
Post a Comment